He's back

I went to basketball practice yesterday. The new and improved dairy-free Sam showed up and had a great night. He followed directions, focused, made a couple of baskets and even cracked a joke or two. It was a good night. On the way home, I asked him if he felt better than the week prior. Yeah, I think so, was his response. But when I asked his coach, he enthusiastically shared that Sam was hands down an easier kid to work with this week.

His teachers have been saying the same thing. After a few days of being off, he was back to focusing more on his schoolwork and doing what he was told, when he was told. His first grade teacher came for a visit today and he was the only one who got up to give her a hug. The old Sam would have been too shy and embarrassed to show how he felt. He would have been so uncomfortable – you know that feeling where you want wiggle out of your own skin. But not this Sam. He opened himself up and enjoyed getting a little love and attention back. Don’t we all?

Sam has three more weeks without dairy and then we will try to reintroduce it again. Fingers crossed that he doesn’t have the same reaction. Casey is hopeful and she seems to know what she’s talking about so I am trying to be positive. Very hard for me since I’m a glass half empty kind of gal.

But if it happens again, we will have to consider how much dairy, if any, to allow back into his diet. Because it’s not just that it makes him a little spacey and inattentive. It changes the way he interacts with everyone and everything around him. He doesn’t connect or respond in the expected way and his behavior sets off a not so good reaction from those around him – it makes them treat him differently. Sometimes they get frustrated or annoyed. Some respond by criticizing. Others just walk away. This sends his self-esteem spiraling down and often he withdraws. 

This is the stuff that we all want to avoid. As parents, we have the privilege of seeing our kids at home – where they’re secure, comfortable and their walls come down. We get to experience them at their raw best when they shine and sparkle. And all we want is for everyone to love and appreciate them in the same way. 

So as much as I want to run back to Sweet Orange with Sam at my side for one of our cherished frozen yogurt dates, we may have to come up with something new and dairy-free that we like to share. Because a few minutes of bliss and dancing taste buds is just not worth it. Sam deserves the opportunity to share his true fabulous and sparkly self. And even more than that, I want him to feel the adoration and love that everyone will give him in return.